How will you grade your parenting skills?
“Oga if na you you go wait?” meaning “Mr Man, if it were you, would you wait?”. This was the question that was posed to another passenger inside the bus that i boarded.
It all started when we got into a little bit of traffic that really do not make sense and we had a couple of mobile policemen with their guns in two vehicles blowing their sirens and were not able to move for a while.
The conversation started with talks about the recent robbery attacks in Lagos while commuters were held in traffic. A lady started narrating the incident that took place along Ikorodu road axis the day before, another said she was at a police station when some robbers were brought in and low and behold, they were young guys who were between the ages of 18 and 22.
“I really wondered what they want to do with the money they stole or what their aim is” said the lady.
Another passenger, a man this time around replied, “They want to make quick money and drive big cars in no time without working hard for it.”
And then the conversation went on to blame the government for no job availability and so on and so on like we like doing. We will soon start blaming the government for not putting a pharmacy in front of our house when we have headaches.
This got me thinking that yes they may both be right but when will we start taking responsibility for ourselves, our family and our immediate inner circle.
The main person to be blame here is not the government but the PARENTS. We are overlooking a lot of things because we all think the world is getting more advanced and more enlighten so some things have to be automated just like our computers and phones. NO.
Those young men would have been exhibiting those traits from childhood but the parents were not there to observe. When your child brings another child’s pencil home from school did you ask him/her to return it to the owner and rebuked him/her for it. Also explaining why he or she need to tell you the truth about him loosing his/her pencil in school and you willingly replace it.
When your daughter start to wear her sister’s clothes even if she has her own, did you tell her that it is wrong to covet another person’s property even if it is her sister.
All these little things matter because by the time the kid is in college you have lost control of what he or she will be doing and they will now have to waste years learning life the bitter way if only they had received the proper corrections when they were much younger.
Parents in this our generation have failed the children and if they don’t wake up pretty soon and realise the havoc they are causing in the life of their children it will be too late.
Don’t get me wrong, I know the economic situation is pretty rough now and people have to survive. But it is wrong for both parents not to be available and think that you can buy your child’s attention with gifts and holiday trips or with shouting and beating them at all little incidents.
Children are smarter than the adults give them credit for, they know when you are there and when you are not. They will imitate others that are available and always around them.
We should be happy to train up our child well so they can give us joy in our old age or ignore them at our own peril and have tears and sorrow at old age.
Ever wondered why some African or Nigerian men don’t open the doors for ladies or even wait for the lady to pass in a public place, instead they will bush and struggle the space with you? They were not taught how to do that by their parents
Our children needs us to teach them to be better men and women in future and they in turn will be better parents to their kids.